tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16655936776902166882024-02-07T04:01:29.327-08:00Spray'd Family LifeAnything that catches my eye and supports me in growing and thriving, I post here so you can have it too! I'll also post basic updates of our family life.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.comBlogger158125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-52367213966693300772013-08-06T17:08:00.001-07:002013-08-06T17:20:13.596-07:00REDACTED is no longer REDACTED!!! REDACTED is no longer redacted! Our Kickstarter is LIVE!<br />
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<a href="http://www.espionagecosmetics.com/kickstarter" target="_blank">THE SECRET PROJECT -- Click here to see!</a><br />
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<br />
I am so happy to finally be able to tell you all about what I have been working on for the last three months (four if you count my time coming up with the original idea and getting the courage to do something about it)<br />
We have created a whole line of nerd nail wraps!!!!! (I know, its exciting!)<br />
For those who don't know, nail wraps are basically instant manicures - they come in a few forms: pre painted and dried nail polish, stickers, hybrid sticker/nail polish, and vinyl heat-activated wraps (usually found in nail salons). I found these in sticker and nail polish form at the drugstore, and frickin fell in LOVE. I could have awesome nails without worrying about drying time, and with designs on them! Of course, I was a little disappointed with the designs available - super mainstream lame girly stuff. But I figured I could find better ones online.<br />
Nope. Well, there were better designs, but they were just interesting, mainstream designs. I was going to buy them, as "good enough", and then I stumbled upon Bonnie Burton's Geeky Fingernails pinterest page. Now I already love Bonnie, but when I saw this page, I knew 'I must have cooler nail wraps.' She had space nails, mario nails, glitter fades, batman - it was amazing! The space nails, I wanted them. I NEEDED them. But no wraps available online.....<sad face=""></sad><br />
Over almost two weeks I went back to Bonnie's page over and over, longing, wanting...and then I saw Neil deGrasse Tyson repost a space nail wrap someone got from the UK. O.M.G.!!!!<br />
It now had to be a thing. I searched and searched, and no US maker?!! This had to be fixed. I looked into suppliers, got a basic range for prices, and reached out to my amazing, amazing friend Jaimie Cordero. She founded Espionage Cosmetics a year and a half ago, and is just an amazing business woman. We talked for a week and pretty much danced around each other - I wanted to partner with her on this, but didn't want her to feel like I was co-opting her brand, and she really wanted to partner with me but didn't want me to feel like she was taking my idea. Eventually we both came out to each other about our fears, and this thing started! May 4, it was on, and now, August 5, the Kickstarter is live!<br />
omg, omg, OMG! I have never had an idea of mine take off this big and still been fully involved. Its our baby! Mine and Jaimie, and it is insane. Also, her team is holy frak amazing! Everyone is on it, no one slacks off, and they are sharp! Talent and intelligence for days!<br />
This would never have happened as quickly without them, and I am super glad it happened quickly, cause I'm seeing so many nail wraps coming out now. Essie has a line, Sephora has a line, Scratch and Incoco are growing fast, and now us, coming in to the game right in the middle with frakking unreal cool designs.<br />
I am so overwhelmed by how awesome this is, and so grateful to be a part of such an unbelievable team. Thank you Espionage and thank you Jaimie! This would not have been even close to as amazing as it actually is without your vision, drive and awesome team!<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-61179261896484332212013-07-25T11:03:00.003-07:002013-07-25T11:03:46.892-07:00Can time move a little faster please?I am so obsessed at this point. [REDACTED] is taking over my life. I'm checking my email every five minutes, facebook every three - basically, I need something else to do. Homework is no good, too boring. And there's only so much to do at work.<br />
<br />
Basically, its just amazing to see my loves being meshed and becoming one awesome product. I'd do more on the project myself, but we have such an amazing team, there is no way I would I take work away from them. They are better at it than I am - so while it would be fun to do the design/writing/production/back end/management myself, it would entirely defeat the purpose of partnering with such an amazing and talented group of people. This is where you hand it over and let them do their amazing amazing thing. :) So now its a waiting game: is there something for me to do now? 'not yet' now? 'not yet' now?<br />
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In other news, the weather is amazing here and we have been super happy to be outside and enjoy it. Other than today of course, cause I'm stuck in an office with a schizo AC, that can only do sweltering hot sauna or frigid ice box. No in between. Its 84 outside and I have a hoodie on. Seriously.<br />
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Classes continue to go as expected, which is basically lots of work but not a lot of challenge. All the challenge and the fun is [REDACTED] which so effing awesome, I am just chomping at the bit to show you guys!<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-30132677494554165422013-07-22T12:19:00.002-07:002013-07-22T12:22:24.262-07:00T minus two weeks and countingThis weekend was amazing. No, I did not go to ComicCon (sad face) but this was worth not going. We did the photoshoot for [REDACTED]. And guys, the experience was amazing. So many emotional moments - my idea is being made! Its real and its beautiful and its going to be a thing!<br />
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I've always been creative, but there are very few things I've created in the world that are easy to point to and say "that was me" - well, me and Jaimie and a whole bunch of amazing people. But I was a part of it! I have lots of things I have created for myself, or for a small group of people, but this is big. Its surreal, and, when I let myself feel it, completely overwhelming and exciting. We are two weeks away, today, from announcement and it is killing me to continue to hold it in. <br />
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And on top of the amazingness that is everything we are doing, I met and worked with truly amazing people. The Espionage team is fun, talented and extremely professional. And when my part was done, I had a blast hanging out with the gals and Tony, Andy and Curtis. You guys made my afternoon. But dude, the shoot was so together, there were no snags, no problems, and we finished on time. Unbelievable.<br />
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Here are the BTS shots, if you haven't seen them on my Facebook or Tumblr yet:<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-21377087567516392632013-06-25T11:05:00.002-07:002013-06-25T11:05:52.498-07:00Phonetree Hell<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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What the hell is with large companies and ridiculously large
phone trees? And the voice?! How much more robotic and frustrating can you get?
Can we please just record a normal person saying the phrases you want, rather
than piecing single word records together? It grates on my nerves so heinously…I
can barely listen I’m so frustrated. All I want to do is throw down the phone. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Why not just press zero, you say? Because there is no option
too! I press zero and all I get is “Sorry. I. Did. Not. Understand. Your.
Response.” I say “customer service” and I get the same. I say “operator” and I
get the same. Cheap ass companies don’t want to pay for a customer service
phone group, so I have to wait through five phonetree branches, select what I hope
is the correct selection (would I have gotten a better match to my problem if I
had selected “2” instead of “3”? I don’t know!), and now wait for someone to
call me back who will probably say “oh, I can’t help you with that. You need x
dept.” Then they’ll transfer me, and I’ll wait some more. The worst is when
dept number 2 says “I’m not sure why they sent you over here. You really need
dept 3” and it just goes on and on. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Why? Why do I put myself through this?! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
At least I opted to use the “we’ll call you back” option. So
now I’m waiting, and waiting, and waiting. Someday they will call me back. “Someday
my call will come…” cause waiting decent customer service from this company
(who will not be named, cause really, it could be any company, right?) feels a
lot like waiting for my handsome Prince Charming…pointless and a waste of my
energy. I’ll save myself thank you. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But of course, this is an issue I actually need to speak to
someone about. So la-te-dah-te-dah. I’m still waiting, wondering if they ever
will call me back. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And now I’m hungry. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Gah!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-37078273161569069812013-05-28T14:20:00.000-07:002013-05-28T14:20:57.047-07:00Learning to Breathe While RunningBreathing while running: this is a skill that I learned a few years ago. You'd think it'd be easy, but you'd be wrong - well, at least when it comes to me. Breathing while running, really running, not just a short sprint but a nice long run, was pretty tough for me. I'd gas out so fast and my lungs would be on fire and I'd get these nasty side stiches that would not quit. It sucked.<br />
<br />
You know what the key turned out to be? Don't panic. Don't worry. Don't get too excited. Relax. Breathe normally, and don't push it. And don't don't DON'T try to run at someone else's pace. I was never the person who was going to run a six minute mile. Ten minutes is plenty good, and as long as I accepted that was my current ability, I could relax and enjoy the run. And when I did that, something amazing happened. I could breathe. I didn't have to think about it. I wasn't panting and wheezing, I was <i>breathing</i>. And it felt WONDERFUL.<br />
<br />
Why am I talking about this? Because I feel pretty strongly that I'm going through the same lesson again, but this time in my life. I am so excited and inspired by everything going on that I am rushing and pushing to get to the next thing - cause guys, every next thing is even more exciting than the thing before it. Its amazing! And not everything is perfect, but it really is fun.<br />
<br />
The trouble is, the more I rush and sprint, the harder it is to live the rest of my life - in short, it just gets harder to breathe. I had a wonderful forced holiday this weekend and I realized I have completely forgotten to enjoy life while I was rushing to the next thing. <br />
<br />
So, this is my new task - to relax, and keep on running.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-91077956363505977152013-05-09T12:39:00.005-07:002013-05-09T12:39:47.581-07:00Ain't Nobody Got Time For ThatI am just floored. When did my life become so exciting, and so focused? I'm sitting here in lecture, surrounded by a bunch of twenty-something college students, overhearing conversations about boyfriends and college events and how hard everything is, how crammed their lives are Oh boo-hoo. My first thought was 'they have no frickin clue' and then I remembered how it felt when I was there: what it was like figuring out how to balance work and school and life, learning what types of things deserved my attention and my energy, and which just didn't, how everything that came up felt equally important and that I had to take on and deal with everything. All at once.<br />
<br />
Today I find myself working full time, going to school half time, raising a toddler, maintaining a healthy relationship with my husband, family and friends and carving out extra time for myself and my passions. Does it take skill and effort? Hell yes. Is it overwhelming? Not even close. Not right now. I know myself now. I know what I want, what is worth my energy and what isn't. I have fabulous people around me who are suppoortive and understanding, even as I suppport and understand them. And things that are stressful, hurtful, upseting or overwhelming are just not even on the radar. If it ain't helping me out or helping my family out, its just out. period. As the meme out there says 'Ain't nobody got time for that.'<br />
<br />
Of course, there are overwhelming moments, but the key is to notice that I'm overwhelmed and figure out what I have taken on that I don't need to worry about. Usually its some deadline/future issue that I don't need to worry about right now - so, yay! Time to take a breath and enjoy something great.<br />
<br />
Its really amazing to see just how far I've ccome in terms of life. I suppose you could call that growing up, but it doesn't feel like growing up. It feels like growing aware. I may not "act my age" but I certainly "act myself" which is way more valuble IMHO.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-88583935023497330512013-05-06T10:39:00.002-07:002013-05-06T10:39:48.370-07:00My Brain Does Not Always Have My Best Interests at Heart<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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I am so excited about [REDACTED], (I can’t actually talk
about yet, because it’s not yet a done deal). And yet, I’m being kept up in the
middle of the night with ideas and anxiety about it. Mostly excited anxiety,
because I’m less worried about it failing than I am that it’s going to go so
well I won’t know how to handle it. I swear, I can’t not worry – it’s going to
be <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">too good</i> so I’d better freak out
and not sleep?!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Srsly, Brain? You suck. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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Basically what I’m doing right now is blocking out time to
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those time blocks. I certainly have enough other stuff to do, between work,
school and family. So I’m just limiting the amount of time I can work on it,
and thus, theoretically, the amount of time I spend freaking out/bouncing
around. It kinda works….0_o. The rest of the time, I just give in and be
obsessive and crazy working at 4am. But overall, I wouldn’t trade it for
anything.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(And I seriously can’t wait
until I can share [REDACTED] with you guys!)</div>
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</xml><![endif]-->Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-55475917531737077002012-08-07T13:22:00.002-07:002012-08-07T13:22:42.370-07:00Yoga with Jeremy!Yesterday Jeremy and I did our first hot yoga class ever, and for Jeremy, his first actual yoga class ever. The first ten minutes I was sure it was an awful idea. Its already 90 outside and I'm walking into a heated room to exercise. Does this make any sense?<br />
<br />
We chose it because it fit into our schedule, not for any other reason. Interestingly enough, we both liked it. Even Jeremy, who HATES being hot. I can't say much about Jeremy's experience, but it was very cool/wierd/awesome for me. Something interesting happened when I stopped paying attention to the heat - I didn't care. After 10 minutes or so, the yoga practice got harder - a lot of fast and challenging movements and I had to decide what to focus on. Heat or Yoga? <br />
<br />
I chose yoga. Its why I was there afterall. And once I chose that, the heat didn't seem to be an issue. Yes, I sweat. A lot. Like, A LOT. So much that I didn't feel sticky at the end. My sweat was just water. I had, in fact, bathed in sweat. (wow) I also had to really focus on my breathing. My body kept wanting to hold its breath, like it was waiting for things to get easier. Yeah, that wasn't going to happen. So lots of breathing focus, which basically kept me going. <br />
<br />
And yes, there were moments where I had to take breaks, less for the heat than for the fact that some of those yoga poses were damn hard. But overall, it was great. I walked out feeling wonderful and energized. I had spent an hour focused on my balance, and my breathing and it was fabulous. <br />
<br />
I'm not sure how we would have done had we not been eating as healthy as we have. (I had a hamburger on Sunday and shrimp today but otherwise, no meat for two weeks!) And for those who have done Bikram Yoga, this was not Bikram. The room was only heated to 98 degrees, so not as hot. Probably about as hot as I would go though. It was uncomfortable but tolerable.<br />
<br />
We are going back on Wednesday for another (non-heated) class called Samurai Yoga which incorporates martial arts. I'm a bit sore so I may need to take it easy, but I am totally excited about it!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-80964150345883615572012-07-31T10:16:00.002-07:002012-07-31T10:16:44.241-07:00The Family that Shares....Almost three weeks ago Jeremy came back from ComicCon. And he brought us all a little gift...sinus infections! Yay! I've never had one before and I gotta say, they are so much.....fun? <br />
<br />
No. No they are not fun. They are crappy and debilitating, and they don't go away on their own no matter how much you take care of yourself. When, six days in, I still had yellow crap coming out of my nose at the pace of gallons a day, I gave in and went to the doctor. Now I'm on pain pills, steroids for the swelling, and a massive dose of antibiotics that will probably take me over a month to recover from. Thanks Hun!<br />
<br />
Josh got it too, and has been fighting fevers and whatnot for almost two weeks. He just gets the antibiotics, and so far, so good. Hopefully he gets better without needing anything stronger or more invasive. <br />
<br />
The one kinda good thing that has come from this is that I FINALLY understand Jeremy's eating habits. He constantly craves salt and fried foods and junk, and then complains about how yucky he feels.* For years I've done what I can to support his learning to eat well, but I never understood why the habit got started. I mean, his body literally HATES that food. He has the fastest negative feedback to junk food I've ever seen, so why on earth did such a strong eating habit develop? One answer: sinus infections.<br />
<br />
To explain, last night we went out to eat, and I ordered what I thought would be an amazing dish or morracan veggies with quinoa and couscous. Yeah, tasteless. Not because of the food, but because my infection would not let me taste it. Thankfully Josh got chips, beans and cheese and they were so salty, they were AWESOME. I hate the whole plate (Josh didn't want it anyway - he had filled up on crackers before dinner). I told Jeremy how wierd it was that I craved such a salty dish, and he said "Now you know how I felt most of my life." <br />
<br />
Jeremy probably had a chronic sinus infection for years, or at least major problems with his sinuses, when he was a teenager. But he lived in a state that didn't provide insurance for children and his parents owned a small business that meant they couldn't afford health insurance much of the time. So he went untreated. And then ate only the food he could taste - salty, fried, junk food. Sure, it caused (and still causes) a host of other problems, but I tell ya, I totally get it now. Cause man is it hard to force yourself to eat something you can't taste. Hard, I tell ya.<br />
<br />
So now I get it. I get why he tends to eat the way he does, I get why everyone complains so much about sinus infections (yes, they do, in fact, suck hairy rat balls) and I get that I seriously am never waiting to report a sinus infection to a doctor again. Yuck!<br />
<br />
*On a side note, Jeremy recently decided to try eating vegetarian, gluten free, and nothing fried. Its amazing! We are finally eating the way I would always choose to eat, and both of us feel so freakin good! (except for the whole sinus infection thing)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-79324446177158243132012-07-16T15:51:00.002-07:002012-07-16T15:51:38.774-07:00Updates!I know you all are wondering how my hunt for fulfillment is going (and by you all I mean Cindy - Hi Cindy!) Its been interesting, to say the least, especially with all the change and upheaval gong on with Jeremy and his getting back into acting.<br />
<br />
So far I am very clear that yoga, ballet and lindy hop are very prominent in the "get back to me" project I have going on. Bob Harper's Yoga for the Warrior continues to kick my ass, and dance makes me feel alive, so they all get to stay.<br />
<br />
I'm also feeling very driven about to rather surprising (to me) things that I'm just going to own right now. First, I have fallen into the position of de facto manager for Jeremy - planning things out, keeping him on track, making sure steps are followed up on. I seem uniquely qualified for it (accountant) and it totally lets me use my business-y brain, which, up till now as felt very patronized and ignored by the rest of the world (for those feminists out there, yes its mostly by men, but I don't necessarily think that's a statement about sexism, just a statement about who I have around me at any given time).<br />
<br />
Second, I am owning that I am a seriously opinionated woman, and need an outlet for it. So I am starting a Tumblr, and maybe another blog. Tumblr first, because I find I mostly want to repost stuff I find with a short comment rather than write a whole blog. And facebook and twitter aren't really the greatest places for said repost - too many family members and whatnot. I'd rather keep those social media actually just social, and link to my Tumblr instead. So watch for that in the coming days too.<br />
<br />
I will post pictures/videos of dancing in the near future, just cause I'm all about sharing everything right now. And now that I've promised, I have to deliver. And that will drive me to continue with this whole thing, which, of course, is the point of this crazy exercise.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-19841357505318728372012-07-13T23:25:00.001-07:002012-07-13T23:25:21.800-07:00What I LoveI have started several blog posts since my last one, but have yet to finish one. They all start well, with news and excitement and everything you'd like to hear, but where they go, I don't know. They trickle off into blather and I lose my point, so I save a draft and figure I'll get back to it.<br />
<br />
So never fear, those posts do exist and they are very nearly done. But tonight I just felt the need to write. Jeremy is at ComicCon, where there are so many people trying to tweet and text and call and check their twitterfeed and whatnot that getting a signal is nigh on impossible. So while I wait with baited breathe, he can not call until late night, when he is so exhausted he is barely comprehensible.<br />
<br />
But I am awake and alive and wishing I had someone to share it with. I did the entire Bob Harper Yoga workout this afternoon, finished my book, and, just now, at 11pm, spent the last 20 minutes dancing around my living room reveling in the energy and flexibility I had forgotten I had. I have come to one very solid conclusion, I love Dance. In all its forms, permutations, and styles. Even the metaphorical ones, like the dance of conversation. But really, just dance.<br />
<br />
And I will get to share that with Jeremy, maybe never as deeply as I would like, but definitely more than the summary dance class that we have done previously. Internet, I promise you, I will have a fabulous, wonderful night of dancing with Jeremy while we are still young enough to enjoy it.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-77705016579406019352012-06-28T10:49:00.000-07:002012-06-28T10:51:22.645-07:00Why I support the Affordable Care Act aka ObamacareI know there are a lot of mixed emotions out there regarding the Supreme Court's decision that the Affordable Care Act (aka ObamaCare) is constitutional. I wanted to write about why I support it, and why I think this will be a great thing for our country - not from a political perspective, but from a fiscal one. I'm also going to avoid using statistics, because any numbers I pull will seem biased to someone, so forgive the generalities.<br />
<br />
<b>FIRST: I am pasting in a really great "explain to me like I am a five year old" explanation of the health insurance mandate portion of the Affordable Care Act - just cause I love it</b><br />
From user 10over6 at reddit.com:<br />
<br />
Bob: Hi, insurance company. I'd like to buy some health insurance.<br />
Insurance company: No. You had cancer when you were 3 years old, and the cancer could come back. We're not selling health insurance to you.<br />
Bob: It's not my fault I got cancer when I was three! Besides, that was years ago!<br />
Insurance company: If we sell insurance to you, we'll probably lose money, and we're not doing it.
Bob: But I need insurance more than anyone! My cancer might come back!<br />
Insurance company: We don't care. We're not selling you insurance.<br />
Obama: Hey, that's totally not fair. Bob is right, he does need insurance! Sell Bob some insurance.<br />
Insurance company: If we have to, I guess.<br />
Mary: This is cool. Obama said the insurance company has to sell insurance to anyone who needs it.<br />
Sam: Hey, I have an idea. I'm going to stop paying for health insurance. If I get sick, I can always go buy some insurance then. The insurance company won't be able to say no, because Obama's told them they have to sell it to anyone who needs it!<br />
Dave: that's a great idea! I'm not paying for health insurance either, at least not until I get sick.<br />
Insurance company: Hey! If everyone stops paying for insurance, we'll go bankrupt!<br />
Obama: Oh come on Sam and Dave, that's not fair either.<br />
Dave: I don't care. It saves me money.<br />
Obama: Oh for god's sake. Sam, Dave, you have to keep paying for health insurance, and not wait until you're sick. You too, Mary and Bob.<br />
Mary: But I'm broke! I can't buy insurance! I just don't have any money.<br />
Obama: Mary, show me your piggy bank. Oh, wow, you really are broke. Ok, tell you what. You still have to buy insurance, but I'll help you pay 95% of the cost.<br />
Mary: thank you.<br />
Obama: I need an aspirin.<br />
Insurance company: We're not paying for that aspirin.<br />
<br />
Here is the link to "Explain Obamacare to me like I am a five year old" if you are interested. It is really helpful if you don't know what is in the law: <a href="http://www.reddit.com/r/explainlikeimfive/comments/vb8vs/eli5_what_exactly_is_obamacare_and_what_did_it/c530lfx%20">Explain Obamacare and what it changed - Like I Am Five</a><br />
<br />
<b>And now to my own reasons why I support the Supreme Court's decision</b>. Everyday, lots and lots of people need emergency care. Some because its actually an emergency, and some because they could not afford preventative care. Those people who couldn't afford preventative care are paid for by every taxpayer in America, because they can't afford the emergency care any more than they could afford the preventative care. Some people say that we should just turn those people away. Maybe, but logistically this isn't feasible. If hospitals did this, then no matter if you bleeding out, dying in the waiting room, they would need to verify insurance before treating you. And if they didn't, then when it came time to pay, they would pursue you to the ends of the earth to collect. The logical conclusion of this is that more people would be poverty stricken, homeless, and unhealthy - thus unable to work.<br />
<br />
When a larger portion of the population is unable to work, they not only become a drag on our economy, but we lose production power. Our economy grows slowly, or not at all.
At the end of the day, growing our economy and increasing our buying power is why we pay taxes. We pay so that the money can go to anything we deem may improve our community - police, fire, education, health care, city beautification - anything that might A) improve our ability to make goods and services, B) protect those goods and services, or C) bring more dollars in to our communities to buy our goods and services. Taking care of our work force is one way we do that. So at the end of the day, having people pay taxes that go towards taking care of our work force makes economical sense. And having those people who may need more treatment pay more taxes also makes sense (assuming ability to pay). This is what the health care mandate of the Affordable Care Act says - those who do not have health insurance (and are thus more likely to need emergency care at some point) will pay an increased tax amount, if they have the ability to pay said amount.<br />
<br />
I also really love the way the Supreme Court made its ruling - they said the federal government cannot force states to take on such a huge burden as the increased medicare requirements (too much power to the federal government) AND that though they are upholding the Affordable Care Act's health insurance mandate, it is as a tax and not as an extension of the Commerce Clause (which, had they allowed that language in the Act, would also have given the federal government too much power.) This is, in my opinion, a win for the country in every way. The dangerous parts of the Act are neutralized and the parts that are good for our country fiscally are upheld.<br />
<br />
I know we as a country are still hurting, and it seems stupid to pass spending bills, but here's the thing: austerity only works in the short term. If you (as an individual) are in debt, you can cut everything out of your budget to raise the money to pay your debt - health insurance, car maintenance, your college fund (or retirement fund), buying clothes to replace worn out ones, etc. All this stuff works in the short term. But long term, it catches up with you - you get caught in an emergency and you have no way to handle it because you cut all your preparedness spending.<br />
<br />
PS - Talking about austerity in terms of how an individual spends or saves money is a really, really simplistic way to look at it, and doesn't get into the realities of economic policies and their affect on national and global markets at all, but I think its a decent way to explain my viewpoint without diving into years of economic theory and training.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-37186964464253163482012-06-27T16:08:00.001-07:002012-06-27T16:08:54.083-07:00In which I bounce between total excitement and being green with envyUnsurprising to anyone who knows him even a little, Jeremy has realized that he really needs to be an actor. I am 110% for this - it makes him happy, it's unreal how good he is at it, and I think it will be huge for him as a career.
A bit of history: When we met, he told me that he was an actor, and loved acting. That he had given up acting for the current moment, but probably not forever. I believe the reasons included drama, no money, less than no money, and something about how his acting career just never got off the ground. He had two theories about why this was: A) He had tried to go for dramatic/leading man roles, but he is best suited for comedy and character roles, and B) That he had a face that he needed to grow into, that would look much more camera friendly later, so he'd probably be best once he was 30 or 35. I'll add C) He was in LA, which is one of the hardest places to start an acting career, simply due to the size of the talent pool.
So when he came home after filming JourneyQuest in Seattle with Fran Kranz and told me he wanted to pursue acting again, I wasn't just ok with it, I was thrilled! He was literally glowing when he came home from filming (and not just from all the energy drinks). It was as if five years of aging and "growing up" had just lifted from his face. Its amazing to see him so happy and fulfilled. And thank goodness there are ongoing projects to work on! It gets that momentum really going strong.
I have been doing everything I can to support this, and keep it going, so traveling to at least a few cons and rekindling relationships was pretty high on my list for him. I was really trying to figure out how to get him to Comic-Con, since just about everyone even mildly important would be there, and then he figured it out himself! He's going with ZOE to promote everything they are working on! So yay! Super exciting! And boo...I can't go! (This is where the green-ness comes in) I am seriously, SERIOUSLY jealous. I told him the only way for me to NOT turn into the green-eyed monster was if we went to GenCon. Not sure how we're going to figure that one out, but we will. Oh we will. I will not be left behind while he has fun without me twice in one year!
Jeremy is working on something that would at least help with the cost of GenCon, so here's hoping that turns out! In the meantime, I'll see what type of creative money movement we can get going to make this thing happen.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-39890968078871009492012-06-25T15:05:00.000-07:002012-06-25T15:05:11.334-07:00lost photosA few days ago I pulled out my phone to show a co-worker the adorable pictures I had taken of my son, and how photogenic he is, and how great his play shot were, and everything else I could gush about (I love being a mom). When I got to the gallery in my phone, they were missing. gone. Couldn't find them anywhere!
I started to panic, and then I calmed down and googled everything I could think of about lost photos, recovering deleted photos, everything.
After reading a bit I felt pretty confident that so long as I didn't use my phone, I could recover these images. So I tried. And I tried again. And then I tried something different. Nope, nope and nope. I have tried for several hours at this point, digging into every nook and cranny of my phones internal and external memory with very limited success. I found Angry Birds ads, Free iPad promotions, and 17 images out of 100+ that were missing.
Honestly, I know they are just pictures, and I'll take lots more and its really not that big of a deal, but Gah! Its a big deal! Its ruining my whole day. My whole week. I had such enjoyment from those photos, and now they are gone.
Its really amazing how much value we can place on little things. Photos, souvenirs, old emails. I would love to say that I am over such things, but I'm not. I'm just sad. I have the memories, and plenty of other photos, but THOSE photos are gone. Boo.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-7671530042361771372012-06-20T12:42:00.003-07:002012-06-20T12:42:30.340-07:00Fun Creative ActivitiesI'm feeling pretty good right now. I've done 15 minutes of intense activity everyday so far this week, and it is awesome! Just Dance 2 at home, hula hooping, yoga at work (yoga designed as an intense workout, not the super flow relaxing yoga.) We have a room in the back that everyone keeps saying we should turn into a gym. Well, I got tired of waiting - so I just moved some tables and did 15 minutes of yoga. Now its a yoga gym. You're welcome office!
For those who are also on a get fit/feel better kick I'll share some specifics. I haven't come up with a solid plan yet, other than to continue my 15 minutes a day of intense activity, but I am currently around 155 lbs (I haven't weighed myself in the last few days), and I'm going to get back to 138 where I belong. Eating better is a big part of that, and activity is a great way to keep me eating better. When I am active, I hate sugar and junk food, so that makes everything else about losing weight easy. (I know, I have great genes. I blame my parents)
Being active* also helps me with sleep, and general attitude, so yay for that too! It helps that work is fairly slow right now (someone buy some frickin cream already!) so I have time to workout, and read my facebook, and in general get reconnected to my life.
And also, to read the latest book for Felicia Day's Vaginal Fantasy Hangout book club. SciFi/Fantasy smutty books! Fab guilty pleasure, and after watching last month's discussion on youtube, I thought, "Why not?," so here I am. Reading Kushiel's Dart - not a bad book, as far as books go, but I can't get the movie Dangerous Beauty out of my head while I'm reading it. I'll post more once I'm further into the plot.
* P.S. - Notice how I use the terms 'active' and 'activity' instead of 'working out'? I hate the term 'working out'. It just makes everything feel like....well, like I'm working. But 'active' is exciting, its activity, and activity is creative and fun. And I like fun creative activities.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-32726955056375050682012-06-18T15:14:00.002-07:002012-06-18T15:14:59.170-07:00Once again, I abandoned my blog. Not because I wanted to, or hated blogging, or anything like that. Just because, well, priorities people. I need things like food, and sleep, and a job.
And right around the time I abandoned it, I moved cities (to Portland - LOVE IT!) and careers (to recruiting - not so much love there). At the time, if had asked me about recruiting, I would have had nothing but glowing, gushing, lovely things to say about it. And honestly, it does still appeal to part of me - the part that can never let things go, the part that is a perfectionist, the part that really REALLY wants to be the ballsy "career gal", and, oh yeah, the part that likes making tons of money. :P
But the real me, the one that comes out whenever I'm not trying to be something else, the one that is easy going and positive and a total geek, that one did not like recruiting. At. All. So here I am, back to being an accountant. Going to school to make it "official" - apparently in accounting no degree=no pay, so a degree I shall get. And yay! Now that I'm not killing myself every minute to be a successful recruiter, I have time and energy and more than a little excitement to bring back other parts of my life, like dancing, music, gaming, maybe a con or two, and blogging. *giant smiley face*
And for those who are wondering, yes, I love my new job. I work 35 hours a week, and its pretty low key at that. My boss is hysterical and super easy-going. And, because of our work schedules, I get to spend every Friday afternoon with Jeremy, sans Joshua! I cannot tell you how amazing and luxurious it feels to spend whole hours without our son. Honestly, it feels a little naughty (but little kid naughty, like you got an extra cookie and no one noticed...not that other thing you were all thinking.)
I'm still trying to figure out what to do with myself. I have so many passions that I have put aside to be a mom and career gal, that I'm torn which one I should pick up first. I'll write about it as much as I can (great way to work it all out), and maybe someone can help me out with ideas.
Peanut Gallery suggestions so far: Irish dance (did it in college, was definitely fun), and some cool community college class (possible, but which one?!!?!?!)
I'm also leaning towards a lot more swing dancing (always a first choice, but the dances start so late at night...), guitar/piano/voice (maybe I could make an awesome youtube video of my songs and gain internet fame! Or, maybe I'll just invite a lot of trolling....dangerous idea right there), hula hooping (fun activity AND gets me back into shape - side note: PNW winters are really bad for fitness. I have got to plan better next winter), crochet/crafting (definitely fun, but would it be active enough?)
Well, that's about as much my brain can handle right now. Updates to come in the near-ish future. :)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-39481405567515707302011-03-28T18:34:00.000-07:002011-03-28T18:34:52.835-07:00Tired ramblingsSo tired.<br />
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We let Josh taste a bit of plain yogurt last night as a test to see if he had outgrown his dairy sensitivity. <br />
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Test failed. Midnight to 7am was one big blur of 40 minute cat naps while he tried to sleep, woke up and whined, tried to sleep again. I will not be trying that again any time soon.<br />
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Since we were so out of it, Jeremy and I decided to walk to Starbucks, and ended up just having a great morning walking and talking and really connecting with the fact that we are moving in a week. Its surreal, and not just because I lack REM sleep.<br />
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We are so comfortable here, and we're jumping into something so unknown. Everything is going to be exciting no doubt, and challenging, but in what ways? All I can do is wonder and wait. Will the connections Jeremy and I have made in Portland grow? What new connections are waiting to be made? And what will life be like? <br />
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We had our going away party this weekend, fun and sad. But almost everyone there will be in the Portland area sometime this year, so it wasn't so awful. And we get to see Don and Cindy so soon, its hard not to be excited about that. Everything is working out....so now what do I focus on next?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-72131452832854792092011-03-25T12:23:00.000-07:002011-03-25T12:23:16.844-07:00In which I write far too much about my lifeWow, life has been busy. I've barely had time to think, let alone blog, so this post is way overdue. Life hasn't been particularly difficult or stressful, but with the move so close Jeremy and I have been busting our butts getting ready. Add to that the crazy growth Joshua's been experiencing (with the additional needs and time that takes) and it adds up to one tired mama.<br />
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We found what we think will be a great apartment in the Bull Mountain neighborhood of Tigard, 8-10 minutes southwest of Portland on the 99W. Its a two bedroom on the third floor (top floor) in a nice complex with its own playground. Hopefully that bodes well for the family friendliness of the neighborhood. My brother Dirk checked it out, and he's the type of guy that if he likes it, then you know its good, cause he doesn't get excited all that easy. <br />
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We got all rushed and packed everything away, only to discover that the move date is 9 days away, and we don't have anything left to pack but the last minute pieces. (And all of Josh's toys. I keep explaining that its just for a couple weeks, but he's not buying it.) So, all the prep that can be done has been done. Moving Van, Apt, Utilities set up, Non-Essentials packed. Done. <br />
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Now what?<br />
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Catching up with my life. I finally got to send some recent pics to the family members, and posted some on facebook for the rest of y'all. Josh has four teeth now. The top two are very much in, but will probably grow a bit bigger before they are done. He's a speed demon crawling master, getting into EVERYTHING, way too strong for his own good. Pulling out the cat box, lifting up the baby gate (when its not snapped in), he can even lift himself up briefly by pulling on our dresser drawers. He's pulled himself to standing, one handed, and is letting go more and more frequently to see how long he can stay up.<br />
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He's also learning some pretty big things. The internets say he's learning categories right now, and lots of dexterity with his hands. I can totally see the second one, cause he's picking up every little tiny thing he can see, and then putting in his mouth and scaring me half to death. And he's discovered that saying "mum mum mum" gets him picked up and loved, so its become his mom/dad/caretaker word (it occasionally shifts to "mama" and I get all excited)<br />
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Until yesterday, he really was having a hard time sleeping, and eating solid foods, all due to his crazy busy brain, so they say. (They being mommy-bloggers, child development experts, and various other parenting websites) But finally, we've had two nights in a row of decent sleep, and he's napping IN HIS CRIB right now. (For almost three weeks, we've had to hold him or drive him in the car to get him to nap at all) So maybe he's finally finished the growth spurt he was working on, and now is winding down to routine and normalcy again. God, that would be great. Fingers crossed. <br />
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And now I'm going to stop typing cause this is becoming an novel. Next chapter: How to keep a 9 month old (yes, he really will be 9 months old on the 8th) busy and calm during a three day moving trip across state lines. Woo!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-20539133501008061962011-03-10T13:16:00.000-08:002011-03-10T13:16:01.000-08:00More Big HappeningsThings are progressing at a very fast pace. I have a job offer from Accountants International, official documentation pending, to start on April 6 in Portland. Katy-1, Unemployment rate-0!<br />
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Good pay, great benefits, and I like my new boss a lot. I'm very excited. I'm nervous that its so different from what I've done before, but I feel like the skills I'll be learning will be great for the future, even if I go back to accounting.<br />
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My last day at Roadside is March 31, and we move on the 1st! We just sent Max off to be in his PAALS Doggy Sanctuary in CO this morning, and are now looking for places to live in the Lake Oswego/Tualatin/SW Portland area so that I will be close to my work. One nice thing about only having one small dog is that we don't need a yard so we can look at townhomes and apartments as well as houses for rent, which makes a big difference with our budget. Yay for money savings! And yay for Max finding a happy home with lots of other doggies. I'm sad to see him go, but its such a better thing for everyone involved, I have to be happy for him too. I hope he likes his new home.<br />
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I hope we like our new home too. More to come...Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-5066916192547509882011-03-07T17:09:00.000-08:002011-03-07T17:09:51.305-08:00The Portland VortexMy Mom coined the phrase. She said we had opened up an energy vortex, the Portland Vortex, gave it a direction, put energy in it to make is spin, and now we are all being swept up because its taken on a life of its own.<br />
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Well yes, that is exactly how I feel. Its all of my own making, but right now, I totally feel like I am being swept up into a whirlpool, partly laughing cause its fun and cool, and partly freaked cause I might drown. <br />
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I just sent my references and salary history to Randi at Accountants International and am expecting a job offer within the week. Randi asked me how soon I could move, cause they want me now, and I said three weeks was the soonest I could possibly be there. And now its hitting me, I may be in Portland in less than a month. And we need a place to live, and to pack and to drive up. And I'll be away from my parents, who have been so amazingly helpful to have around (instant babysitters, and wonderful emotional support). And I'll be away from my friends. Yeah, the panic is trying to come up.<br />
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And then there's the additional stress of Max. Wonderful Max the Dog who just doesn't get babies. Who tried so hard, but just can't get it. He hasn't bit Joshua yet, but he's come close enough that we have decided he needs a new home. So we are calling everywhere, trying to find a shelter that will adopt him out. Sigh. It is really hard to let him go, even though it will be best for everyone. And in the midst of this other stress, its just crazy. But it'll get worse before it gets better, and that scares me the most: that Max will get more violent with Josh as the vortex continues to spin. He's never been good with stress or changes. <br />
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So, on we go, one foot in front of the other. There's no turning back now, just moving forward. Deep breaths.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-2957429838589780342011-03-04T18:34:00.000-08:002011-03-04T18:34:56.536-08:00My InterviewMy interview with Accountants International is done, and from all signs it went great! It didn't end in a job offer, but it really felt as if they were ready to hire me today if I were available. Hopefully, they will be willing to wait until my move date, or to help me with moving expenses so I can be up there sooner.<br />
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I am nervous, and feel a bit like this might be an awful move. But at the same time, it feels exciting, exhilarating to see a new path in front of me, rather than the well worn accountant's path.<br />
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I wish I knew that they would for sure offer me the job. Or that some mention would be made. I'm getting worried that my timeline might make or break this opportunity. I think I'll ask Randi to be sure. (Manager at the Lake Oswego office) I'd rather be proactive about it than lose the position by playing coy.<br />
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Yes, if I'm really honest with myself, I want this job. Its scary and new and might be the wrong place for me, but despite all that, I want this job. And I am going to do what I can to get it.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-30232860538064473822011-02-27T14:54:00.000-08:002011-02-27T14:54:58.299-08:00Portland: UpdateAfter a phone interview and some emails back and forth, it looks like I may actually become a financial recruiter. Accountants International is flying me back to Portland on Friday for an in person interview!<br />
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Unfortunately its just a quick trip, barely a few hours, but it feels pretty awesome. Every way I look at it, this seems like a great opportunity. I get to learn about the companies in the Portland area, learn some sales and negotiating skills, and have a job right when I get to Portland. Worse case senario, I can leave after a few months. But there's a very real possibility that I will like it (from everything I've heard it sounds like something that would really suit me) so I could very well stay for quite some time. And if that happens, I could work on my MBA much easier at this type of job than in a controller type of position.<br />
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The only thing that really scares me is this sense that at this point in my life, I should be specializing rather than switching careers. But the skills will be so invaluable, that doesn't bother me very much. Anyway, the interview is on Friday, so I will know more once that is complete. <br />
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Yay! Big adventures!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-43476106479406285442011-02-18T14:01:00.000-08:002011-02-18T14:01:01.100-08:00Portland Trip: DownloadWow, what a whirlwind trip I had. Six days in beautiful Portland (hardly any rain while I was there - really gorgeous).<br />
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First let me just say to everyone one I met and everyone who reached out a hand in friendship, thank you. You cemented my love for Portland.<br />
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I'm just going to list highlights, to try keep all the amazingness straight. (No promises)<br />
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When I arrived Monday afternoon, my first meeting was with a recruiter at Boly:Welch, a smallish firm in downtown Portland. I missed my exit, freaked out, finally found my way and parking, and walked six blocks in pouring rain (which is only did for the 10 minutes I was walking those six blocks). It felt like an awful start, and then I got to office. A fabulous office. With smiling people, free tea and coffee, and a dog at the receptionist desk. Sigh. I love you Portland.<br />
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The meeting with Juanita, the recruiter, went great. She said I should have no trouble getting a position, but that I may need to move up to Portland before she can place me. No big, I mostly wanted to get the inside perspective on hiring in my field. And it is good. <br />
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The next day I met with Amy, a friend of my boss Eric, at Water Ave Coffee. BTW, best cappuccino ever, even if it is served with a side of attitude. (my guy was very nice, but Amy's not so much) She gave me the low down on child care, schools, neighborhoods, and few companies to check for work as well. And she sent me over to PSU to check our their PBAC (Post-Baccalaureate Accounting Certificate). As a student I can put Joshua on the waitlist for PSU's awesome version of day care, the Helen Gordon Child Development Center. I went, I saw, and I'm in love. Josh is on their waitlist now, assuming that in a year (about how long the waitlist is) Jeremy may want to re-join the working class. And I'm applying for PSU as well, so we'll both be in school!<br />
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Wed was all about fun in Portland. Met some friends of my stepdad, Greg, had myself a VooDoo Doll, from VooDoo Dounuts, complete with pretzel stick 'pin' stuck in its heart, and just enjoyed downtown. Love this city.<br />
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The rest is a bit of a blur. Met with two controllers at Intel, who had great advice as far as career choices go (they also said PSU was the place to go). Had dinner with my uncle Tony and his wife Lynn (so so so good!) Had the best meeting of all with Kirk, another friend of the boss, who had so much advice and help offered, I was almost overwhelmed by all of it.<br />
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AND in the midst of this, I went to a bunch of networking events, meeting even MORE people who wanted to help me, and are still sending me listing and links and whatnot. I also met Randi, a recruiter at Accountants Int'l, who said she wanted me to interview for an open position they have as a finance and accounting recruiter. I had the phone interview on Tuesday, and I think it went really good. So who knows? There are so many opportunities and openings, I almost wonder what I'm still doing in LA!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-32519536019343338872011-01-25T16:52:00.000-08:002011-01-25T16:52:11.677-08:00On the move!So yes, I am still freaking out and stressed and scared and all that. AND I am excited!<br />
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On Wed I pulled the trigger and bought a round trip ticket to Portland for February 7-10. Hopefully for interviews. If not interviews, than informal meetings with potential employers. If not informal meetings, than networking with people in or connected to my target companies.<br />
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Since the money has already been spent, I have a HUGE incentive to push and create these interviews/meetings etc. My first two days, it was damn terrifying, but now...I actually feel empowered.<br />
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So here's the deal: Since I have this small window, I have to be really proactive about my search, and in trying to be proactive I found out that I have no idea how to do that with a job search! Its all so passive - respond to listed openings and hope someone calls you. Yeah, not gonna work for me. So, though I am still doing that, I spent the weekend really drilling down to specifics that I could act on: 1)What do I want? Specifically? 2)Where do I want to do it?<br />
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What I want is a mid-level accounting position in a dynamic company, specifically software, publishing, marketing. Target companies are Intel, Dark Horse Comics, Nike (a little off of my target, but their accounting dept is pretty interesting), Knowledge University (education software), The Partners Group Ltd, and a couple others that are on my backup list.<br />
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And now I'm using linkedIn, Twitter, Google and anything else I can get my hands on to actually connect with someone at these companies and set up some form of meeting (lunch, coffee, 15 min at the office). It feels so great to take real action and be in charge of something! (way better than the normal job hunt, btw) <br />
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The hope is that even if these companies don't have a current position open for me, they may in the future, or know other companies in similar industries that have an opening, and my resume will come up because (unlike other applicants) they actually know who I am. The proof will be in the pudding, but honestly, this feels like the best way to find a job and every email I send feels like I'm getting just that much closer to my next dream job.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1665593677690216688.post-75254075748113439772011-01-18T13:12:00.000-08:002011-01-18T13:12:58.173-08:00What's holding me back?More specifically, what am I scared of? So, the whole story is that we are moving to Portland. But in order to move to Portland, one of us has to find work up there first. Jeremy is on track with TSA, but they move at their own slow, governmental, beaureacratic speed, so we can't really count on them coming through. Which means I am actively looking for a new job in the Portland area. <br />
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Or at least, I'm going to. I've dragged my feet putting my resume together, dragging my feet getting a cover letter written, dragging my feet looking for companies to apply for. Every step of the way, I do research, and read and think and plan, and then I feel accomplished enough that I call it finished, at least for a while. In fact, the only reason I even have a resume right now is two things:<br />
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One, I gave myself a deadline of Jan 15, which I am overdue on, but not by much. I did do a last minute push to reach that date. Two, I signed up for an online 'class' on hustling, mostly because the first topic interested me: 'Our invisible scripts and how to get over them'. This email list is constantly talking about how people don't take action on what they talk about, or how they let failure stop them before they even really start. It shames me into working for half an hour or so every time I read it.<br />
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So, even though I do have a resume and letter close to ready, it happened way later than it should have, and I'm still pretty uncomfortable sending them out at all. But why? What is the 'invisible script?' The underlying belief that stops me in my tracks? <br />
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I think its something along the lines of "There are no jobs for me up there, and no one can help me, and I'm just going to be stuck in LA forever, so I should just get used to it." Not helpful. Self-fulfilling, but not helpful. Its like I don't think I deserve a decent job or to live in the city I want to live in. I've also got another one that goes "Portland is going to suck and you are going to be so upset that you moved there, just stay in LA where at least you know you can get along ok." But I know I can get along anywhere, if I keep an open mind and let myself enjoy it, so that really is just a bunch of hooey. But its powerful hooey.<br />
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I have to keep myself aware of these "scripts" and take actions in spite of them. To test them. To prove to myself that they are bunk. The actions I'm taking right now, are to just keep moving forward. Sending my resume and cover letter to others to edit and help with, so its not just me that as a stake in it. I have to tell others about my progress. I'm making a list of companies to apply to, and I think I'll make sure Jeremy knows what I'm doing, so he can keep asking me about it too.<br />
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Most of all, I'm not letting myself stop. And not letting myself feel like simple research/reading/surfing the internet is 'progress.' I have to have something concrete. At the very least, I will write down what I'm learning and my thoughts, if researching is all I'm doing for a night, so there is something real I created that day. The only way to get there is to keep moving forward.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03689818596424637984noreply@blogger.com1